The pitch
Charlie’s cat-footwear commercial inspires competing Paddy’s products. Dee invokes her merchandise contract; Mac tries eating the evidence.
Supporting source ↗CASE FILE · S05 E08
Paddy's Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens
S05 E08Photograph not available
With a merchandising convention in town, the gang tries to build the Paddy's brand by developing marketable products---such as mittens for kittens.
THE SHORT VERSION · SPOILERS AHEAD
INSIDE THE CASE.
Read before signing
The Lawyer’s paperwork gives him the merchandising rights and keeps the Gang away. Mac cannot destroy every copy.
Supporting source ↗The merchandise arms race
Cat footwear is only the start. The competing pitches include a branded thong, a novelty towel, an egg-shaped device and a shotgun. Each team treats the others as business rivals.
Supporting source ↗An ad inside the episode
Charlie’s opening commercial gives the mittens a full demonstration on a gray cat. Its bright “Kitten Mittons!!” lettering preserves the product’s on-screen misspelling.
Supporting source ↗THE EVIDENCE
THINGS IN THIS EPISODE.
Characters
Charlie Kelly180 other recorded episodes
Charlie brings the red cat mittens to the bar to explain his product.Source ↗
Dee Reynolds179 other recorded episodes
Dee joins the bar-table discussion before asserting her rights to merchandise revenue.Source ↗
Dennis Reynolds176 other recorded episodes
Dennis models the Paddy’s Pub thong as his entry in the merchandise competition.Source ↗
Frank Reynolds171 other recorded episodes
Frank brings a promotional model into the kitchen while arguing for his own merchandise ideas.Source ↗
Mac180 other recorded episodes
Mac presents the shotgun as a new Paddy’s product, escalating the merchandise rivalry.Source ↗
The Lawyer6 other recorded episodes
The Lawyer is confronted in his car by Dee and Charlie after their office visit.Source ↗
Locations
Paddy’s Pub147 other recorded episodes
Dennis, Dee, Mac and Frank watch Charlie’s homemade commercial in the bar.Source ↗
Objects
Binoculars5 other recorded episodes
Charlie watches from the back seat through binoculars while Dee waits in the driver’s seat.Source ↗
Dick Towel1 other recorded episode
Mac demonstrates the novelty towel’s printed design during the kitchen merchandise pitch.Source ↗
Kitten MittensOnly recorded here so far
Charlie’s commercial shows a gray cat wearing red mittens on its paws, with the product name spelled “Kitten Mittons!!” on screen.Source ↗
Paddy’s EggOnly recorded here so far
Frank joins the kitchen product discussion with his egg-shaped novelty device.Source ↗
Paddy’s shotgun1 other recorded episode
Mac holds up the shotgun during his pitch to Dennis in the bar office.Source ↗
Schemes
Commercials3 other recorded episodes
The episode opens with Charlie’s deliberately rough cat-footwear advertisement.Source ↗
Contract eatingOnly recorded here so far
Mac chews the paper contract Dee says gives her a share of Paddy’s merchandise revenue.Source ↗
Costumes
Paddy’s thongOnly recorded here so far
Dennis lowers his jeans enough to display the branded underwear design.Source ↗
FOLLOW THE THREAD
CONNECTED EPISODES.
S07 E06 Connected through Paddy’s shotgun, Paddy’s Pub, Frank Reynolds and 4 more.
S06 E03 Connected through Dick Towel, Frank Reynolds, Dennis Reynolds and 3 more.
S03 E14 
Connected through Binoculars, Cats, Paddy’s Pub and 5 more.
S08 E07 
Connected through Commercials, Paddy’s Pub, Frank Reynolds and 4 more.
SOURCES & NOTES.
- Episode reference · visual inspection of S05E08 ↗
- Always Sunny Wiki · episode recap ↗
- Springfield! Springfield! · episode dialogue ↗
Tags document researched occurrences, not every appearance. Read the research notes and attribution.